17 Weeks Later

Molli at 10 weeks 4 days gestation!

For 17 weeks you have been in heaven while I remain broken down here on earth. Just because Mommy and Daddy are expecting again doesn't mean we have "moved on" or healed from losing you. We miss you everyday and we will always love you! Being pregnant again with your little brother is very hard on Mommy. I worry all the time because of what happened to my sweet Molli. I was so sure you were safe in Mommy's tummy but I was wrong. I trust in God and pray daily once again while rubbing a bump I can't wait to see grow! We miss you so much down here Molli. How I wish I was at my 34th week with you right now. ♥ Until a day, baby girl...

16 Weeks Later

It was so hard today to talk about you to a customer. I told her that your Mommy is due in December and that we pray for ANOTHER baby girl so that we can pass down all the beautiful clothes and toys of yours to her. Then that same customer asked "How far apart in age will they be?" I froze, stuttered, tears filled my eyes, and I looked down at my register... Too much to explain. I lifted my head and said, "They will be almost one year apart!" I didn't mention that you were in heaven and your sister is on her way here... I didn't tell of your passing or tragic ending here on earth... I failed to mention that you never had the chance to wear those beautiful clothes or play with your toys. I couldn't dare explain... I simply said "God has blessed us twice in one year. We had a beautiful baby girl in the first week of January and found out we were expecting again by the end of March." With a smile on my lips and a teardrop sitting still in my eye, I realized that it didn't matter how your story began or ended here on earth with us, it is the fact that we were blessed enough to be able to tell your story at all. You are our miracle of hope always. We love you so very much baby girl. 16 blessed, beautiful, and blissful weeks of carrying you and now 16 empty, sad, and heavy weeks without you... We miss you angel!

Happy 16 week Birthday in Heaven "Mall!" ♥

15 Weeks Later

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15 weeks come with the ache of a splinter that has been left under the skin just barely out of reach. 15 weeks have gone with the slow, dragging pain that is left behind from a heartbreak beyond imagination. I should be celebrating the new pregnancy of Baby C2 but I tend to look back and think of our original Baby C often. I miss her! I miss that special baby that showed her Mommy and Daddy that all things are possible when you put God first. That precious angel that gave new hope and meaning to a life that had lost so much purpose. Our baby girl that we held such love and blind faith for, that we never saw such a tragic ending coming. Mommy wipes tears while writing this and can't imagine life without you still. It doesn't seem real. We love you so much baby! There are no words for how we are left to feel now. You are forever our baby girl. ♥ Always, Mommy, Daddy, and Baby "C2." (Sunny and Starbux miss you too!)

Mommy and Daddy Have Great News!

We're expecting your brother on December 6, 2012!  I'm due in Dec. but our Dr. decided to schedule our delivery for 5 weeks sooner on Halloween (October 31, 2012).  We are so excited to meet him.  I just know he will look like you and I can't wait to hold him.

http://www.pregnology.com/preggoticker80/FF00CC/66FF00/My%20pregnancy/12/06/2012.png

I Thought Of You Today

Mommy thought of you today and tears fell from my eyes. I talked about you to your Auntie Kit and she misses you too. You are so loved here on earth baby girl. There are some things that are never understood though. Mommy and Daddy are expecting a little sibling for you this fall and it breaks our hearts that he won't know you on earth. I just can't imagine why this had to happen to such loving people that would have been such good parents to you. You were such a blessing in our lives and now your baby brother is. I pray he makes it here safe and alive, healthy and happy! We can't take another heartache like the one left behind by your departure. It would be too much to bare for one lifetime. Please tell Jesus we love him and see the miracles he is working here in our lives. Ask him to send down some extra protection for this pregnancy, for Mommy, and for Baby Try.  We love you angel. ♥

14 Weeks Later

It's been 14 weeks now and my heart still hurts because you are not here with us. It never will be the same, never will another take your place, and the love we have for you will never fade. We miss you baby girl. There's a part of us that will remain incomplete and designated just for your memory. Thank you for giving us such joy and happiness for those 4 short months. You meant a new chapter in our lives, a new part to our world, and family makes three. Mommy and Daddy love you!

13 Weeks Later

I think you know what we know by now... Perhaps you even had a hand in it?  It has been 13 very difficult weeks for us and we still cry from time to time, but I have a feeling that these tears of ours will soon fade and turn into joy instead.  God has made beauty from ashes just as I have prayed.  Soon we will celebrate a new pregnancy and I claim it in Jesus' name!  I pray for your baby sister to join us here on earth soon.  I pray she resembles you so that I can have a glimpse of what my Molli would have looked like had she been able to stay here on earth with us.  We miss you so much.  You are always going to be here with us in our hearts, in spirit, and living through your siblings to come.  We will never forget you or stop talking to our baby girl.  We know you are here even though we can't see you.  Sadness is beautiful yet tragic at times...

Happy 13 weeks Birthday Angel!  <3